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Local Swingers | Swinging
Swinging has been a part of sexual culture since the 1950's when it erupted in America. Contrary to belief, swinging is a lifestyle, not a sex method, and it is estimated that 4 million Americans are Swingers. The history of the word "swinging" has evolved with society. Originally deemed "wife swapping," swinging was anything but, and in fact empowered the female. Over time 'wife swapping" changed to "swinging," and more recently "The Lifestyle."
By definition swinging, or the swinging lifestyle, is non-monogamous sexual activity, often treated as a social activity, that can be experienced as a couple.
The roots of swinging go back to Air Force pilots in World War II. They had the financial means to keep their wives close to base, and due to their fatality rate being the highest of any service branch, non-monogamous relationships between these wives and pilots became acceptable. Swinging persisted near Air Force bases throughout World War II and the Korean War. In 1957, as swinging spread to the suburbs, the media caught wind of these arrangements and dubbed the revolution "wife-swapping." During this time, "Key Clubs" were a means of "hooking up" with other swingers. Husbands would drop their car keys into a bowl or into a pile, and the wives would draw a set at random. The owner of the selected keys was your sexual partner for the evening. It wasn't until the 1960's that the first organization "Sexual Freedom League" opened in Berkely, CA. Ultimately, an umbrella organization called the North American Swing Club Association (now NASCA International) was formed to facilitate accurate information about the swinging lifestyle all across America.
Swinging has since matured into a much more selective and lifestyle driven process in modern society. Today's swingers enjoy the luxury of meeting new playmates in a wide variety of methods. Swing clubs, lifestyle groups, swinger dating websites, private house parties and hotel takeover parties are just a few of the avenues couples in the lifestyle are able to meet and enjoy other swingers in their area and across the world.
People who swing come from all economic tiers of society. Every job classification, race and nationality are represented in the lifestyle, however the majority are Caucasian, middle to upper-middle socio-economic class, and married. Swingers, married and single, tend to be adventuresome, emotionally mature and have excellent relationships with their mates and friends. Singles are also involved in swinging, but generally not to the extent of couples.
Single women involved in the lifestyle are affectionately called Unicorns, for their rarity, and are cherished and adored by swingers. In the past, there have been very few women swingers, this has changed however, with the increase of sexual boldness and independence of modern women. Bisexuality plays a great role in the lifestyle of a swinging woman, and with the versatility it brings to their sexual expression, the greater reward they reap in enjoyment.
Generally speaking, men who enter the lifestyle were presently involved as a couple with a previous female partner. Single men face a greater challenge in swinging alone as they are not in high demand, as females are, and are often looked upon as "opportunistic and creepy." Despite this stigma, true single male swingers are often more interested in finding a new relationship or partner within the lifestyle. There are of course those couples that enjoying playing with single males, though they prefer to seek out their own male rather than to be approached by an interested playmate.
Couples who swing are either married, committed, living together or single couples who date. Recent statistics show that 20% of all married Americans swing, and 89.4% of swingers are married. Most couples that enter the swinging lifestyle do so not because their relationship isn't working, but just the opposite. The couples already boast a strong foundation in trust, understanding, communication and love. Swinging allows them to explore sexual and emotional feelings together, thus taking cheating and infidelity out of the relationship. It must be understood that swinging is not a band-aid for a bad relationship, and will likely destroy one that is not strong enough to support the lifestyle.
To understand swinging you must first understand what it is not. Polyamory promotes love between multiple partners with full consent and knowledge, swinging differs in that the love within the couple remains monogamous, while the sexual activities do not. Swinging is often mistaken as cheating. Well, this is simply impossible as swingers have found a way to enjoy sex outside their relationship without deception and lying. Swingers typically play together and with the full consent and knowledge, not to mention excitement and enjoyment, of each partner.
Often there is concern that swinging is unsafe and is at high risk for catching sexually transmitted diseases. This is not true whatsoever, as swingers are able to enjoy sexual freedom by practicing and preaching safe sex. Reports have shown that swinging clubs and private parties are not high risk areas for STD transmission or AIDS. This is in large part due to the majority of the swinging community is make up of responsible middle-class couples who are married, thus being the lowest risk group for having and transmitting STD's and AIDS in the first place. Most swingers are always prepared with their own contraceptives, while almost every on-premise swinger club or party offers condoms for their guests. Regardless, as a swinger it is your personal responsibility to practice safe sex and always make your own judgment in any situation.
Those new to the lifestyle also carry their own concerns or misconceptions. Just to debunk a few of these quickly I will refer to some FAQ I have heard over time.
"If I go to a swinger club or party am I obligated to have sex?" Not at all! While sex does occur at some clubs or parties (these are called on-premise), at other clubs sex is strictly prohibited on-site. Even so, a vast majority of guests enjoy the social aspects these clubs or parties offer, and any sexual activities take place in a private or semi-private area. Either way, you are never under any obligation to have sex with anyone or at any time. These events and venues are a popular way for swingers to meet and mingle with others in the lifestyle. Many swingers prefer to build friendships prior to becoming playmates.
"My partner and I are not comfortable with full swap yet. Will other swingers be accepting of us and still want to play?" Communication is key within any swinging relationship, as well as with potential playmates. It is up to you and your partner to determine your own set of rules and boundaries for swinging, and to express these to your playmates. Every couple and swinger is different. Some will prefer one-on-one sex (oral or intercourse, same room or otherwise) others enjoy threesomes (consider the combinations of female-male-female or male-female-male) and group sex (4 or more sexual partners), in addition to a diversity of fetishes and interests. Half the fun is talking about it, so be sure to get your rules and boundaries out on the table. This will guarantee maximum comfort and enjoyment of your swinging experience!
"Since joining the lifestyle we have heard many terms or acronyms that we are not familiar with. What do they mean?" Well, there are MANY expressions and acronyms in the lifestyle. For that question I'll refer you to the acronym glossary on muah.com.
"What types of swinging are out there?" There are no hard and fast rules in swinging, but everyone has their own comfort level and idea of how far they want to go. Some commonly used ways of describing these are Soft Swinging (giving and receiving oral stimulation with others, no full penetration. This can also mean that couples wish to remain with their own partners, but the females can have sexual interaction with each other), Closed Swinging (used when couples swap partners and have intercourse in separate rooms) and Full Swinging (when couples swap partners and have sex in the same room or bed and interact together to create a group sex environment).
For anyone interested in swinging your choices of how to get involved are nearly limitless. Unlike the antiquated swinger publications, swinger websites have bridged the gap and made meeting other swingers quick, easy and as anonymous as you'd like. Your first step in finding swingers in your area is to create a personal ad. Muah.com offers this service and provides members with the ability to search other swinger ads, filter your preferences and interact via a live video chat room. Many times members will post private parties or events in the forum for any local swingers to attend. Private parties and club events is an excellent way to meet many other swingers in a short period of time, and in a relaxed no-pressure environment. However, admission to these events are usually limited to club members and for first-timers admission can be quite expensive. Making friends through a swinger site will help facilitate the relationships that open doors to many local lifestyle opportunities. Local clubs frequently have meet and greets for new members, and will host events to entice higher membership. Whichever method you decide is best suited for you, just remember to have fun and always put your partner first and foremost.